Amac Productions

Ow seems inadequate for this episode.

Xena’s screams of pain seem inadequate for this episode.

My girlfriend was dying to get to this episode for us to watch and I was dying to get away from it. Then I felt a bit better when she remembered she would have to live through the trauma for a second time with me.

Everything about this episode is just unpleasant.

Callisto returns.

Solan dies.

Gabrielle and Xena are irreparably fractured.

Like we’ve been building to this basically all season. The cracks each of them has put into their relationship by lying to each other. Hiding things from each other.

It started with Hope and it all circled back to her. Hope has grown up some since we last saw her. Able to walk, talk, and free Callisto from her place in the lava where she should have remained forever.

Which would have been nice, don’t you think?

Hope frees her to help do her bidding for her father Dahak and bring about the end of the gods or something like that. Mostly, she needs to get Xena out of the way first and she wants to make her suffer. So she may as well kill her son.

Isn’t she lovely?

Maybe Xena had a point about murdering the tiny baby before she could grow up some and cause all this f*cking trouble. Because we lose Solan, Kaleipus, and whatever was left of Gabrielle and Xena’s relationship.

Because that certainly imploded by the end.

They couldn’t even look at each other.

When they did, they were both crying. And Xena flat out said that Solan was dead because of Gabrielle. Without regard to how Gabrielle might be feeling in this moment as well, because she is also hurting quite a bit.

Not that I’m excusing either of them. They’ve both messed up.

I do understand where Gabrielle was coming from though. She wanted to save her child. She believed she could be good and wanted to protect her just as Xena wanted to protect Solan. Ultimately, placing the children in the same place was the undoing, but still. Then when Gabrielle comes to the realization that Hope is the killer since she knows Solan’s name despite never being told by Gabrielle, she accepts what she must do.

She poisons her as suggested earlier in the episode by Xena.

I think this is an important moment for a couple reasons.

One, we see Gabrielle kill again. While not as terrible as stabbing someone, it’s undoubtedly cutting her deeper since this is her daughter. The daughter she betrayed Xena to keep alive in the first place. That’s not an easy thing to do.

Two, she does this because of her love for Xena and Solan.

In season two, Gabrielle is tasked with Solan’s safety while Xena handles saving everyone. She teaches him how to use a staff and cares for him a great deal. We see they’re still close at the beginning of the episode when she teases him and races him back to the village.

She takes his place against Callisto in the trap Xena sets. She loves him very much as well and is devastated by what Hope has done. To the point that she’s willing to compromise her rules again and undo what she did in the first place by protecting Hope.

To me, I think Xena is far too hurt and angry right now to see that Gabrielle could not take it back, but she could stop it from getting any worse by destroying Hope now.

Gabrielle also appears to wish this is somehow enough to mend things between them, but finds out at their children’s funerals, it is not this simple. Xena blames her for Solan’s death. Anything she did after is irrelevant to her. It was too late.

Xena also misses that Gabrielle is essentially grieving not one, but two children.

Her own daughter and her stepson.

While I know this is technically not a stated relationship, it’s implied. Just like Gabrielle and Xena’s romantic relationship is implied. Same thing.

As I stated before, Gabrielle loves Solan very much. She was charged with his wellbeing last season and is very caring and very much like a stepparent to him the rest of the time. Offering advice and counsel, friendship without ever really telling him what to do.

Xena doesn’t see past her anger.

Gabrielle’s is breaking in so many ways.

As for Xena, I completely understand her being blinded by her rage. Her son was just murdered. She thought she had tucked him away in the safest place. That she was going to finally have him with her all the time, only to lose him. Because of the other person she cares for most in the world.

Ouch. Just fucking ouch.

That moment when Solan asked her to take him with her because she’s who he wanted to be with without Kaleipus to take care of him was amazing. You could see how filled with hope and happiness Xena was only to be filled with utter despair mere hours later.

Here’s the thing though, we for sure knew we were taking a literal child around with us while Xena and Gabrielle get themselves into all sorts of trouble. Did I think they were just going to kill Solan to get rid of that problem? No.

No. I did not.

That was too far people.

Give me Solan back.

And while you’re at it, I think it would actually be super hilarious to see Gabrielle and Xena juggling an 11-year-old while taking down warlords. Would that just not be a fun time?

My goodness, this show doesn’t take itself too seriously on a good day. Let’s see what happens if they have to be parents while trying to take down bad guys. Or fish. Or deal with ill-timed gods doing god things. That would spice up some episodes.

And if it were ever too dangerous, truly, just drop him off at his grandmother’s house. I’m sure she’d love to meet her grandson.

Instead of you know, killing the kid.

I mean, Hope I understand. She’s evil. She’s got to go.

Although, I do feel for Gabrielle. She so wanted her to be good. To prove Xena wrong and for her to be right and in such an awful way is just horrible.

Overall, this episode is a masterclass in angsty writing, directing, and acting.

Everyone who worked on this episode and the ones leading up to it should be teaching classes on how to make it work. Every choice made by everyone leading to now, made this tear feel earned, and important. They thought it out.

How to take these two who were so solid once and smash it into pieces.

I truly didn’t think it could be done, but now that it’s happened in front of me – I can’t imagine how it couldn’t. Every piece was carefully crafted. Building and building and cracking and cracking as the story progressed. Each character making choices and keeping secrets that never felt out of character.

Things happening in the world that make sense.

Tiny tears that become enormous.

Each of them, trying to ignore it in the hopes that things will return to the way they were before a child came between them, because it’s the only love strong enough to rival their own.

It makes perfect sense that we return to Solan with Hope.

Because their children are the only things they love more than each other. They only person or love that could interrupt or damage or compare to what they feel for each other.

Because at the end of the episode, they stand in front of each other. Seeing the worst the other has to offer. What they’re willing to do to protect their children. Gabrielle says she loves Xena.

Xena doesn’t say it, but she can still feel it.

It’s still there.

They both know it.

But they also know it might not be enough. That it may never cross the chasm between them again. That it’s changed and they’re not sure it’ll survive this storm.

They love each other.

But they’ve hurt each other unlike anyone else ever has. Can they find their way back to each other?

Do they even want to?

At the end of the episode, each of them walks away in opposite directions. Gabrielle is the first to leave and Xena exits after on shaky feet like she cannot believe this has happened.

Meanwhile, Gabrielle was almost waiting for this day. For this moment.

For the day Xena discovered that she was lying about Hope’s death. She knew it was coming. Clinging to the moments she had left with Xena until it all blew up in her face. And it would have been bad enough if it was just a lie.

Except, it’s much worse.

It’s cost Solan’s life.

Not just a lie. Her son’s life.

Gabrielle walks away first. She knew this day was coming. She had braced for at least part of it. She hoped love would be enough. Understanding as Xena was a mother too. Except, nothing is as should be.

And love might not be enough.

Xena – meanwhile – is blindsided by the news and grief. She’s crying at the loss of her son. Of Gabrielle. Their relationship. The future they may have had.

She walks off crying on shaking legs.

And lastly, I think it’s really rich to tell Gabrielle that she’s also mad because she lied to her. Hey, Xena, you’re lying too. You promised you wouldn’t kill that guy in Chin and then you did. So…. yeah, don’t throw stones. At least, not about lying.

This episode is as amazing as it is painful and it’s pretty freaking painful, honestly.

Kudos to everyone involved, seriously. It was incredibly well done and should be the prime example of how angst should be written in TV shows. Now, as long as the payoff is just as good, this should be a wonderful season. Albeit an incredibly painful one.

Are you ready? Because I’m not. Onto the next!

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