Amac Productions

Hello?

Should I even bother writing this? Is anyone in the Marina fandom even still alive? Or did we all combust during the shower scene?

And then again during an actual conversation?

What was that episode?

Maya and Carina talked about their feelings!

Carina finally told Maya how she felt all those months she pushed her aside.

Maya listened. She didn’t make excuses! She let her wife speak her feelings and her truth.

Ugh. So good.

And Maya finally apologized.

We learned about Carina’s work goals and what she wants for her own future. To open her own practice? Yes! Please! Can we see this next season?

Also we have a season seven! Whoo!

They went to Joe’s!

They talked about their wedding!

And the shower sex. Ugh. The shower sex!

I want a spin-off of Carina’s medical practice and Maya captain at some station far from 19 where she’ll be appreciated and we get to watch them like this in every single episode. Please and thank you!

Can you imagine?

Letting these two lead their own show? The possibilities! And put it at nine please.

Okay, okay, I’m getting off track.

One of the things I wanted to point out was during the shower scene. I kept thinking it was odd how little Carina was smiling.

Yes, she did have a huge smile when Maya knelt down.

But!

Maya was smiling non-stop throughout the entire thing, while Carina had small smiles here and there. I kept thinking it was odd. Anytime we’ve seen Carina sexual, she has a huge smile on her face.

It clicked when we saw them lying in bed together.

Carina was in a different headspace.

Maya was happy to touch and be touched by her wife again. She was happy to be in their home together. Nothing else mattered in that moment.

Carina – on the other hand – was struggling with being home.

Things were so different when she was last here.

Even collecting her shampoo, the apartment didn’t feel right. Before that, she was packing a bag. And before that, she and Maya barely spoke.

Maya has had time to come to terms with these things.

Carina hasn’t.

Not really.

Her issues haven’t been dealt with.

Which is why that conversation was so important.

Carina got to say her peace. She got to tell Maya what she’s been feeling.

She told Maya last week she was feeling lonely and this week she told Maya how much it hurt to see her wife run from her when she wanted to help her.

How much it hurt not to be her wife’s safe space like Maya is for her.

Except we know more than Carina does.

And even with an understanding of why Maya herself, has done what she did, she didn’t try to justify it. Or explain it away.

She accepted it.

She accepted that she hurt her wife.

She accepted that what they were before broke. It failed. It shattered into pieces.

This moment was why I said last week, I don’t want to start over. There’s a lot of history here, hurt, happiness, things that can’t be forgotten.

They need to talk about it.

The good and the bad.

From the audience we know Maya wasn’t exactly running from Carina. She was running because she was afraid if she stopped she would die.

Maya was stuck in survival mode, and nothing was going to touch her. Not even her wife if it meant death. Because in Maya’s mind, that’s what would happen.

It had nothing to do with Carina. Not really.

But Carina doesn’t know that yet. She didn’t understand it then, not even Maya did.

And I think that’s something else they need to talk about, but last night wasn’t the place for it.

Carina needed to say how she felt. Her pain. Her hurt. And be heard by her wife.

I loved that Maya took it in stride. Carina didn’t say those things for any reason other than to be honest. She needed her wife to know that she was struggling.

Also, I loved how desperately Carina wants to be Maya’s safe space. It was so sweet.

I loved Maya comforting her. Accepting responsibility for what she did and still offering to move forward.

It doesn’t matter how long or what it takes or how much work it is – Maya vowed to do it.

Maya vowed not to let them break again. To build it so strongly that nothing can touch it.

That scene was perfect. And as always, the actresses knocked it out of the park.

Stefania played Carina’s emotions when Maya apologized so perfectly. You could just see on her face how much she needed to hear that from her wife. You could also see how much a hit it was to hear Maya say that their relationship from before died.

It hurt her.

It looked like a physical hit to Carina.

Stefania and Danielle are amazing and amazing together.

I think they both needed to acknowledge – out loud – that what they were before didn’t work.

It doesn’t mean things are broken beyond repair or that they can’t still choose each other or make it work going forward.

It means, they can’t go back.

They can’t pretend everything is fine or that their marriage was completely fine before.

They have to move forward and change together, if they want to be together.

So good.

Sigh.

I loved the shower scene. Their chemistry is downright insane. They are so good together and so comfortable together, it translates through every moment. Every scene.

The intimacy of that moment was played so well as they reconnected.

But it doesn’t fix things.

Yes, it’s important to them. Clearly.

But sex isn’t a solution.

And I loved that, that was a choice they made in progressing things forward. Yes, they can be physically intimate, and still have emotional turmoil.

As for the rest of their moments together, I didn’t think I was going to like them getting interrupted. Again.

But it worked… Somehow.

The moment when Maya meets Carina at the hospital is lovely. She was so ready and willing to put Carina’s wants and needs above her own.

Carina had a tough day?

Need a nap and we’ll see each other later? She can do that. Even though she wanted to spend the day with her wife, what Carina needed was more important.

Yet another wonderful way to show Maya’s growth.

And to show Carina how much Maya cares about her.

Except Carina didn’t want that. No. She just wanted to have a drink and sit somewhere with her wife. She didn’t want to say goodbye to Maya or not spend time with her, just because she was tired.

I loved that Carina was the one who wanted to go to Joe’s and not Maya.

Here we see Carina taking a turn in this reconciliation.

She’s let Maya come to her over and over. Trying to win her back as asked. But here, we saw her ask for something.

And not just any something – the place they met kind of something.

It was not lost on me that this day mirrored their first meeting.

It started at the hospital.

Moved to Joe’s.

And something happened to a nose, making the entire day run off the rails.

And not to mention, Helm was there.

It was kind of like they put those scenes in a blender and it worked. Oddly enough.

We learned about Carina’s desires.

She wants her own practice, something Maya didn’t know. Showing them growing closer.

Carina wants kids.

And that sentence didn’t make Maya run for the hills! She smiled and watched her wife lovely as she declared she wanted kids. With her. Someday. At some point. Not now.

Maya didn’t even flinch.

Another sign of her growth.

And Carina was beyond flustered.

Because she just accidentally admitted she’s thinking about a long future with Maya while they’re working things out slowly. She wants kids and Maya hasn’t always reacted well.

But this time, Maya smiled.

She smiled lovingly and all dopey and in love. Happy to hear her wife wants babies with her one day.

Especially after the first episode of this season when Carina declares she’s not sure she can have a baby with ‘that.’

And Maya doesn’t flinch. She smiles wider.

And it flusters Carina.

She seemed to think it would scare Maya and instead it pulled her closer and made her happy. Carina didn’t have the first clue how to deal with that.

Maya reacting like a scared dear? She knows that.

Maya grinning like a dope in love with her wife and picking out names for their kids in her head with the megawatt smile? Not prepared for that!

Then the whole party thing happened.

The bride smashed her face.

I didn’t expect to enjoy this scene but I really did.

Maya and Carina talking about their wedding and how much they love each other while giving heart eyes. Sign me up. Yes, please.

I loved the bride who declared them the hottest couple (of course) and was upset to marry a man. I could not stop laughing.

The callback from Maya who said Carina is the person she wants to call.

We’ve seen it.

Even this season.

In season four, Maya called Carina several times trying to deal with Black Lives Matter.

She woke up in the hospital and asked for Carina.

She completed her session with Diane and wanted to call Carina.

Maya got lost.

It’s not that she didn’t want to call Carina.

She was so lost, she didn’t know what to say if she did, because she didn’t know what was wrong.

But Maya was armed with more information now. She can be better. They can be better. And they will be.

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